Author Archives: Dr. Bob Huizenga

Is the Distancing Spouse a Bad Person?

Posted on May 11, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

Often the distancing spouse is viewed as the “bad” person. You are perhaps fearful that others look at you and see you as not “trying” to make the marriage or relationship work. You may hear frequently from your spouse or … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. Huizenga's Blog Posts, Emotional Distance, Emotional Infidelity, Infidelity and Intimacy, Infidelity Marriage, Infidelity Reasons, Relationship Communication | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

How do you Handle Emotional Distance?

Posted on May 10, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

These are some major coping patterns, common to the human condition. You automatically and unconsciously call upon YOUR coping pattern when life gets emotionally rough. That’s where you go. That’s what you do. And, long, long ago, it worked. Your … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. Huizenga's Blog Posts, Emotional Distance, Infidelity and Intimacy, Marital Crisis and Self Esteem, Relationship Communication | Tagged , , , | 10 Comments

Your Sexiness is a Trap

Posted on May 9, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

If you are a female, you may carry the weight of believing you must be sexy. You must be provocative. You must look sexy. You must turn him on. Your breasts, you legs, your abs, your rear become the focus … Continue reading →

Posted in Relationship Communication, Relationships: Marriage, Relationships: Sex and Intimacy, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | 12 Comments

Emotional Connection without Talking in Your Marriage

Posted on May 8, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

The emotional connection or closeness you strongly desire in your marriage can happen. WITHOUT talking. A look, a facial expression, a glance, a touch or a warm movement of the body may “connect.” I prefer to use the word engage … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. Huizenga's Blog Posts, Infidelity and Intimacy, Rebuilding the Marriage or Relationship, Relationship Communication, Relationships: Marriage | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

Frustration in Marriage and the Affair

Posted on May 7, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

A tremendous amount of frustration and resentment builds in your marriage when you believe you must squelch yourself and spend inordinate time and energy going that extra mile to meet the personal needs of your spouse. Resentment emerges as you … Continue reading →

Posted in Emotional Distance, Infidelity and Intimacy, Rebuilding the Marriage or Relationship, Relationship Communication, Relationships: Marriage | Tagged , , , , | 15 Comments

Freedom in Marriage

Posted on May 6, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

Marriage can be an environment in which freedom, fun, excitement, spontaneity is cultivated. Sure, not all of the time, but even in the more difficult time you can be ready for the humor and loving support that is able to … Continue reading →

Posted in Infidelity and Intimacy, Rebuilding the Marriage or Relationship, Relationship Communication, Relationships: Marriage | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

The Intimacy Dance in a Marriage

Posted on May 3, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

The pursuing-distancing intimacy “dance” is played over and over again in a marriage, with the same results. Neither spouse flourishes nor experiences joy in the marriage or relationship. Every Marriage Has It. Please leave your comments below. Has infidelity been … Continue reading →

Posted in Emotional Distance, Infidelity and Intimacy, Relationships: Sex and Intimacy | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

4 Reasons an Affair or Marital Crisis Kills your Self Esteem

Posted on April 23, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

Nothing tears at your self esteem and sense of well being more than a marital crisis. The question is often posed to me by someone in the midst of a painful relationship upheaval: “What did I do wrong?” You assume … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. Huizenga's Blog Posts, Emotional Infidelity, Infidelity Coaching, Infidelity Marriage, Infidelity Pain, Marital Crisis and Self Esteem, Relationships: Marriage, Self Care, Surviving Infidelity, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Infidelity Pain: The Key to Hurting Less

Posted on April 20, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

A marriage crisis brings all your pain and hurt, seemingly buried for years, screaming at you. You are in pain! You are in a ton of hurt. The pain can be incredible, debilitating and persistent: It just won’t let you … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. Huizenga's Blog Posts, Emotional Distance, Emotional Infidelity, Infidelity Coaching, Infidelity Marriage, Infidelity Pain, Real Life Infidelity Stories, Self Care, Surviving Infidelity | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Normal People Suffer from Infidelity

Posted on April 8, 2013 by Dr. Bob Huizenga

You really are normal. I often reflect: What about what I do that people find so liberating and helpful? Here’s what I think it is: I help those suffering from marriage crisis to feel normal, that they are not defective, … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. Huizenga's Blog Posts, Emotional Distance, Emotional Infidelity, Infidelity and Intimacy, Infidelity Coaching, Infidelity Marriage, Infidelity Reasons, Rebuilding the Marriage or Relationship, Relationship Communication, Signs of Infidelity, Surviving Infidelity, Types of Affairs | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment