Surviving Infidelity: Talking Your Way Through the Shock of Infidelity
The following testimonial describes one woman’s journey from the discovery of infidelity to regaining a sense of joy:
I felt that I moved through the first 3-6 months in a state of shock. I was very scattered, could not eat or sleep or concentrate and was obsessed by my discovery. What helped was talking and talking and more talking to a very small group of friends who were nonjudgmental and had “been there” and were there for me. Although you want to lash out in all directions, Dr. Bob is right not to involved children or family. I needed to take medical leave from my job as I was a MESS. It is now 3 years later and only now am I regaining a sense of joy. I have tried to take back my life. I am really really trying and it is not easy to take my attention off my husband and put it back where it belongs – on me. I am trying to work out regularily, eat well, do what I want to do and regain back the important friendships and activities that I let slip away. I am also trying to focus on the future, not the past and realizing that there are OTHER people out there who will enjoy and celebrate me for being me. I am trying to believe in the goodness of men and know that there are many good men out there. The lies and deception are toxic to your soul. It has taken a very long time for me to realize that I did not take this off the rails although also equally important to understand what happened and why. I have had to do a lot of soul searching and own “my side of the street”. Dr. Bob’s 7 different scenarios have been a lifeline for me, as have been very many telephone sessions with him. I spent a lot of time in counselling as well but it really is a process and there are no rules or time expectations for this very personal journey. You will learn so much about yourself and being forced out of a comfort zone takes you to places you never would have realized before. Steel is forged by fire. Things I would have done differently: Probably totally extricated myself from the situation until I could achieve some clarity and get my head on straight. Involve far less people. Realize far earlier that my husband at the time was the last person that I needed for validation and approval. Train myself to charge neutral – it really does make you feel a lot more in control and better about yourself. Taking care of yourself is huge even though there are days when you feel like you are walking through quicksand. Read and Read and Read and learn all you can. Dr. Bob’s resources really made me feel like I was not alone and that my reactions and feelings were normal and expected.
More Surviving Infidelity Stories and Comments
Cheating Spouse = Depression, Anger and Grief
I’m a Survivor and I WILL Conquer Infidelity
Life After the Numbness Subsides
